Naruto Vs
by Joseph6241
Summary: In this Multiverse you will find Naruto, and Naruto being sucked out of his own dimension to fight with other characters from other manga, games, anime, books, TV shows, movies, and more! You decide who Naruto fights! Just leave a comment with a character and what the character is from! (Ex: Link, The Legend of Zelda)! Rated T for use of violence, and mild use of strong language!
1. Chapter 1

Ch 1 Disclaimer : I do not claim ownership to the Naruto franchise. Or any other franchise in this fantasy Naruto Vs!

Chapter One: The first battle.

Naruto was going trough his regular morning steps, shower, shit, dress, eat, and out. He was having a normal day of doing normal things and he was quite enjoying his normal day, as he had gone trough more than enough excitement in the last twelve months. But that was all in the past for Naruto as he lived his normal day on his normal street with his normal friends. Now about those last twelve months...

ONE YEAR EARLIER...

Naruto was on patrol when he heard a noise, he looked to the origin and saw nothing. He shrugged it off and went back to walking around the border of the village. 'It is a beautiful night today' thought Naruto. A loud noise roared through the forest as Naruto walked the patrol route. Naruto knew that this time he was not just hearing things. He walked to where he heard the noise and looked around, he saw multiple swings came from all directions and sent Naruto flying away from his position.  
When he stood up he was in a different world entirely, a world with many trees and a river and much heavy thicket. Naruto was to busy admiring the beauty of the place he had just been brought to to notice a shadow creep to his side. Fists was all Naruto saw for the next few minutes. One from the left another from the right. The swings started coming more often. Then one very powerful smack sent him flying once again. He hit the ground hard, and may of had some part of his spine snapped, though his body would probably tap into its own regenerative powers to fix itself. Sweat dripped from every inch of Naruto's body as he panted from the last blow he had been hit by He looked to his right all he saw was trees. "Not good" He whispered to himself. Out of nowhere another hit came and sent Naruto flying north bound. He rose from where he landed and looked around then jumped. Now hiding in a high branch of a ash tree, he looked around again, still seeing nothing but tall thicket. "Damn!" Exclaimed Naruto.  
Another hit from behind him sent him once again flying. He was able to get a peak behind himself while flying and saw his enemy for the first time. His foe was a man wearing a dark blue full body cover and a black belt and to complete his getup he had a face shroud. 'He must be a ninja.' Thought Naruto. But who was the ninja working for? Naruto would worry about that later, but for now he would worry about finding a way to beat this guy. Before Naruto hit the ground he slapped a piece of paper on a low hanging branch to his side. When he hit the ground he forced himself to stay still and be quiet despite his intense pain due to his many now broken bones, which were quickly fixing themselves.

He heard his adversary moving through the trees then he heard him jump to the ground. His opponent moved closer. The quite possibly rough ninja leaned over Naruto. Just at that moment Naruto traveled at near light speed to the piece of paper he put on the branch and leaped at the ninja sinking a kunai deep into his foes chest.

As his enemy died Naruto tried to get a better look at his face. Upon finding no further evidence of who he had just killed he lifted the body and brought it to the river near his position and dumped in the dead maybe 'rough' ninja. He raised from where he stood turned around and took a deep breath. "We'll now I'm hungry again" Naruto said quickly. Right then, a strange force blurred his vision until he could only see colors and lights, shapes no longer holding their unquestionable importance, then the same strange force gave him the felling of his body being pulled apart and distorted.  
All at once his vision cleared and the distorting felling stop. When Naruto pulled himself together he was back on his patrol route. "Huh" Naruto said. "I couldn't have dreamed it could I?" Although Naruto knew for a fact that it all had happened, for his cuts, pains, aches, and bruises, all led to the same conclusion, he had just been sucked into another world fought a (possibly) rough ninja, and then brought back.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or One Piece.

Chapter two: The Pirate Complex.

Naruto was still quite a bit freaked out about what had happened to him the other day, and thus he was being paranoid.

Now, he wasn't putting boxes on his feet and wearing a sower cap all the time, but he was looking around corners before moving on. Most would think he was over reacting, after all that all was behind him. Or was it?  
His mind kept moving to thoughts of the sea. "Hm... maybe it's time for a vacation" Thought Naruto.  
Little did he know a small vacation was waiting for him just around the corner.

His mind blurred and he fell asleep, when his mind came to he was in the forest again, only this time he was at the edge. Naruto's senses went wild on the fresh smell of sea water and the smooth touch of sand, that and the perfect cloudless sky and his mind was at piece. That is until he was cut by the surprisingly sharp edge of a cutlass. He was knocked to the ground only because the cutlass hit one of his ribs, and not being able to cut through, shoved Naruto's body to the ground. The man wielding the deadly weapon laughed. "No one can survive a fight with Laffy D. Monkey! You will die here bleeding out onto the sand! Ha!"  
"Dude what the heck is wrong with you!?" Naruto Coughed out through mouthfuls of blood.

"Whats wrong with me?! I'll tell you whats wrong with me! I just got back from 2 years at sea eating nohin' but dry biscuits! Thats whats wrong with me you little piece of shit!" Naruto was a bit taken aback by the pirates manner of speech.  
"Okay monkey, how 'bought a deal, you, take your crab ass away from me, and I don't kill you." Naruto's said as his flesh was sealing, he flicked a bit of water at Laffy. Laffy Looked at Naruto in detest.  
"An' whys should I be scared by a little wimp like… you." Laffy said very slowly.  
"Because I am a freakin' ninja, thats why you sea salted, dirt encrusted piece of crap!" Naruto Lunged at Laffy, and landed in the water. He Looked over and saw an old bucket, which he grabbed. "Ha! You thought you could land a blow on m-…!" Laffy was forced to the ground by tons after tons of water being poured on his head and body. Laffy looked around himself. "What!? Why an I surrounded by this infernal bloke!?" Screamed Laffy as more of the sea was dumped onto his figure.

"Because like I said, I'm a ninja!" Naruto walked back bait to see all of the shadow clones he had made with the bucket he grabbed. they had formed an oval, on one end Laffy, on the other, the sea. They were simply moving water from the sea to Laffy. "Hey boss, how much longer do we have to do this?!"  
One of the clones called out to Naruto. "Until he drowns!" Naruto called back, "Now back to work!" Laffy face had turned to a look of horror.  
"What! When do they stop!?" Naruto smiled  
"When your dead, Laffy." Naruto said, with a dead pan expression on his face. "But… how did you know what water did to me!?" Cried out Laffy as Naruto walked away. Naruto turned around. He smiled. "Why should you care, your dead" He turned back, and then he heard a limb crack above him. Naruto was to hungry to dodge the incoming branch. It struck him hard in the head and he blacked out.

When Naruto work up he was in the ER and had a bad head ache. "Well. That conforms that i will have no ramen money today." There were some people around him. He listened in on their conversation, "Nurse, unless he has some internal problem, I can find nothing wrong with him."  
"But doctor, I assure that when we brought in this man his head was bleeding!" Naruto smiled in his anesthetic induced state. 'They are finding out about my healing powers.' He thought to himself.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Pokemon or Naruto. **

**Three: The Power of Pokemon...**

Naruto was becoming very sickened at the idea of getting out of bed, after all that had happened, but he had responsibility so he was forced, day after day for a week, to get up and do some easy run and fetch missions. By now, he had assumed that all that had happened was a unbearably realistic dream, but he was still avoiding the places he had been sucked into the forest near.  
He was doing an easy mission on this day where he was to watch a suspected thief and take note of his behavior.  
Naruto had an uneasy feeling in his stomach.  
He made no note of it as he leaped to a rooftop near the felon. The young ninja had a sudden stabbing sensation in his knees, he fell from the tiled roof and landed on a stand selling coats and hats.

Naruto blacked out as he was falling.

Red was strolling through the forest where he had settled down for the time being. He took a breath of fresh air, but smelled an outstanding aroma of noodles and sweaty jumpsuits.  
Red followed the smell to a bush where he found a stranger. A stranger in a orange jumpsuit.  
The boy in orange awoke upon Red shaking him and pulling him from the thorns where he lay. "Thanks" Naruto told the boy who had helped him.  
Red smiled, "Don't mention it. By the way, what were you doing in that bush?"  
Naruto fiddled with his hands uneasily, he knew he could not tell this stranger what he was really up to so he made a lie,  
"I was... practicing climbing trees and fell. Lucky I fell on this bush!"

"Sure, sure," Red said, "Anyhow, you need anything to eat or a place to rest for a bit?"  
Naruto's brain sent off a thousand different red alarms.

"Uh..." Studded Naruto, "No, I don't think I need I need anything from you. But thanks for the offer?"  
"It's okay," Red said looking at a distant tree, "Not many do in these parts, they probably think I want to kill them and eat them." Naruto backed up after that remark. He looked right into Red's eyes and said "I think I'll be going now..."

"No! … I mean... I have no friends around here and would love the company." Red made big eyes at Naruto.  
"Nah, I really think I should go now..." Stammered Naruto.

Red retorted. "I should think we'll battle over the matter!"  
Now it was Naruto's turn to retort. "No way! I don't wanna fight you! Plus look at yourself! You couldn't stand a fight with my dinner, let alone me!"

Red laughed "What do you mean _I _couldn't stand to fight you! I mean a _Pokemon_battle!"

Naruto decided to humor this obvious tard and fight him, "OK. Lets fight."

Red smiled, pulled out a red and white ball and threw the ball at his feet. Out came a creature like to a bush or a vine mixed with a dog. Red, looking pleased with himself, raised his head to see Naruto, "Your turn."  
Naruto, shocked with the monster, ran and killed the thing as fast as he could. (AKA, one hit K.O.)  
Red screamed and sent a red laser at his monster and it went back the ball from which it came. Red then turned to Naruto and started to yell at him,  
"YOU MONSTER, HOW COULD YOU, YOU HURT HIM, YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO HIT HIM, YOUR POKEMON ARE, WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU!?"

Naruto was shocked to say the least.

FIVE MINUTES LATER

Naruto had destroyed all of Red's Pokemon and had sent him home.  
Naruto tripped and when he got up he was at home in bed holding a forum congratulating him for the capture of a wanted murderer. "Huh. I wonder how that happened."

**Chapter Three**, _END_


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: The only thing I own is my foot. My foot is neither Naruto or Kirby.

Chapter Four: Kirby Curbs Hunger...

Naruto stretched in his bed as the warm summer light beat down from outside the window, warming the room and making Naruto quite relaxed.  
Out of nowhere a ball came crashing through the pane window, startling Naruto and effectively waking him up. Before Naruto could investigate he heard a rushed knock on his door. He cracked his back one more time and then made his way to the door, making sure not to get glass in his bare feet.  
He reached the door and barely had it open when the loud voice of a young boy,who was about 5' tall and had tan skin, much like the other two, rose to speak for his group of three.  
"Gee, mister, sorry we accidentally broke the window. Is there any way we could get the ball back?"  
Naruto Hesitated. He couldn't just simply let them off the hook, but they were barely older than eight.  
Naruto came to a decision. "You almost broke open this vile of deadly poison that I keep with me! But you know what, you can have your ball,"  
Three smiles came to the faces of the boys.  
"But you must take some of my morning work." Said Naruto.

The smiles left the kids faces. The shortest of the group huffed, "Well alright..."

Naruto, now having done his lighter than normal morning workload, had retreated to a meadow after having a heavy breakfast, so heavy in fact, he had some leftovers. He turned his head to one side as some pollen flew through the air.  
Naruto felt something hit him in the back of his head. Hard. Then all he felt was the soft grass of the meadow and something gnawing on his leg.

He cock his head to his leg while he recovered from the smack on his head. He was very surprised to find that the thing on his leg was pink, and almost no legs of its own.  
Naruto shook his leg and punched the object, but to no avail. Eventually though, he did manage to at least stir the small creature.

Kirby had been dreaming when a stranger woke him. With his fists. All the context Kirby had to go on was, I was eating this person alive and they are hitting me. Having been in situations like this before, Kirby knew the best thing to do was to release the leg and inhale the attacker.

Naruto was quite pleased as the puffball spit out his leg, even if he was not to happy with the slobber that stayed on his shin. Naruto was about to give the thing a stern lecture when he realized that it was actually somewhat innocent looking.  
"Oh... where you having a bad drea-" Naruto's cooing was cut short by a tiny little fist hitting him square in the face. Naruto instinctively made a few shadow clones and jumped high, all in the blink of an eye.

Kirby was very pleased with the hit he had put on his foe, but was not very pleased with his hit seemingly causing the man with funny hair to duplicate multiple times. Kirby opened his mouth wide and began to inhale all of the twigs and stray leaves on the ground, soon consuming branches and very quickly sweeping up the shadow clones.

Naruto stood on a high branch dumbfounded as he watched his clones last few moments came rushing to him.  
"Ew." Spat Naruto under his breath.  
He knew he needed a plan, but clones would not work at all. 'I know!' thought Naruto. He jumped from the he was in to a limb that was a few feet away and, while in the air, tossed a kunai at the blob down below. However, instead of having the intended effect, it simply bounced of the creatures head.

Kirby felt an object hit him on the head and bounce a couple feet away. Kirby, confused as how the object got there, as it was not organic material he had already dispatched the duplicating men, walked over to it, picked it up, and after giving it a short inspection, ate it.  
Kirby flashed for a split second and then had a kunai in his hand similar to the one he ate, along with a headband. Kirby now felt a new urge flowing through him, cut things.

Naruto watch in shock as the blob transformed, and as the pink orb started to cut down trees, Naruto's plan emerged in his head. He removed his leftovers from breakfast and the vile of deadly poison he kept with him, poured the deadly poison on the leftovers and jumped out of the tree.  
Naruto yelled, "Hey ding-ball!"

Kirby turned to him, about to start swing the sharp kunai, stopped dead at the sight of food.

"You can have it, if you put down the kunai." Said Naruto. Kirby was more than happy to drop the weapon and run over to Naruto, inhale the food in seconds, and run off. But he did not make it far.

Naruto walked to the unmoving lump of pink mass to check if the poison worked, which it had, to a great degree.  
Naruto nearly barfed upon smelling the corpse of the puffball, "That is disgusting. I did NOT realize the poison would work that fast on something that small."  
The horrid sent became stronger with every step Naruto took, upon reaching the body he turned it over to face him, at which point the aroma was to strong and knocked him out cold.

Naruto was awoken, now in the meadow again, by the three kids from earlier,  
"Gee, sir, sorry we hit you with the ball, are you alright?"  
"Yeah all be fine. Just watch where you're throwing that thing." Responded Naruto.  
And with that Naruto went to get a heavy lunch.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Just Dance 2 or Saw

Chapter Five: Just Die...

Naruto had finished his morning rounds and was satisfied that the village was safe. As he walked back into the town he noticed that some of the villagers were jigging out to a bard that had set up on the corner. The bard wore a red and purple vest with matching pants that, apparently, had emphases on being ridiculous. He looked to his other side and saw a mask merchant talking to the butcher, Naruto puffed his chest, "Business as usual."

Naruto stopped in is tracks when he heard a low rumble, his thoughts began to race, every cell he had worked at one hundred percent to locate the source of the noise. He heard again, this time though, he realized it was his stomach, "I guess I should go get some ramen!" Laughed Naruto.

Upon reaching the stand which he held closest to his heart, he noticed a new employee handing out his most beloved substance, ramen. The employee was an elderly man, who looked like he had been through a lot, but gave off an aura of hope and new beginnings.

Naruto was far to hungry to care who served him at this point, so when it was his turn in line he was quite hasty.  
"Hey old guy! I need a big bowl with lots of heat, here's the cash!" Said Naruto.  
The old man smiled, "Don't worry, your ramen will have plenty of heat..."

A few minutes passed until Naruto was handed his well earned ramen, which he devoured in seconds. Naruto began to walk away from the stand. He was in a haste to get home to his bed so instead of taking the main road home he took a short cut through an ally.  
"I don't feel very good..." Sighed Naruto.  
"Stop right there." Naruto turned around to see whom had spoken to him, to his surprise, it was the old man from the ramen stand.  
"What do you want old fart? I'm in a bit of a hurry."

The same smile that was on the old mans face from earlier returned to shape the wrinkles of his face.  
"I want you to come here..." Beckoned the old man.

Naruto complied. He knew he could take the old guy, so why not see what he want's? Then, as Naruto approached the elderly man, he received a sucker punch to the face.

Now, normally even a punch to the face from a young buff dude would not have phased him, but little did he know, the old man had slipped rat poison into his ramen, causing the punch to make Naruto's face one big bruise, and effectively knocking him out instantly.

FOUR HOURS LATER:

When Naruto stirred, he found himself in a dark room lit with dim psychedelic neon lights, but what really made it weird is that there were people dancing and he had no idea how he got there, or why his hands were bound.  
"I see you have awoken, child." Naruto cocked his head to see who had spoken and was surprised that it was a man wearing a red and white mask.  
"Who are you and what do you want with me?" Asked Naruto.  
"Oh, I just want you to play my game, that's all. You're haste showed me that you are unwilling to slow down and enjoy the gift of life. If you are not willing to fight for life, you do not deserve it."

Naruto was taken back by the mans insane ideas of how life worked, but Naruto knew if he wanted out this place, he would have to humor the maniac.  
"What does that mean for me though?" Responded Naruto.

The man let out an evil laugh, "It means, you must complete my game if you want to leave here alive!"

Naruto decided playing a game would not be to hard, especially if it meant getting out of here.

"What is the game I have to play?" Inquired Naruto.  
The man took a louder, more serious tone when he answered, "You must kill all of these dancers."  
Everyone in the area looked over to where Naruto was and started to stare him down.  
"You sick freak." Spat Naruto.

"One more thing," Started the man, "You only have a minute"

With that, the man cut loose Naruto's hands and started a stopwatch, "Better hurry up." He said.

Naruto only had a minute, but he also had a plan. Naruto made a couple hundred shadow clones, sending most of them to restrain the angry dancers and the rest to beat up the man who brought him here.  
Needless to say, he won, but out from behind the bar counter, one more dancer ran at him and smashed a bottle over his head.

When Naruto woke up, he was back in the ally. It was dark now, and Naruto really just wanted a bed.

When he got home he looked in mirror, shock at the bruise that covered his face and the bump on top of his head, and went to bed.  
"I'm getting tired of this crap." Were the last words he spoke before he dowsed off into a peaceful rest.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or F-Zero.

Second Disclaimer: I do NOT sanction underage drinking under ANY circumstances.

Chapter Six: Racing the Falcon...

Naruto was, as per usual, sitting lazily at his favorite ramen stand with Sakura after a hard day of relentless and tiring ninja business.

"Today was great!" Exclaimed Naruto to his pink-haired colleague Sakura.

She gave him a puzzled look, "What made today so special?"

Naruto realized what he had sad and, not yet wanting to reveal his recent fights yet, came up with a cover, "Oh, uh... the weather was nice?"

Sakura smiled, "You dunce, I can read you like a book, Naruto. I knew it would be something stupid and pointless, like the weather."

However, little to Sakura's knowledge, Naruto had much greater things on his mind.

'Hm... Today I haven't been sucked into one of those fights...' Thought Naruto.

"Hey Naruto." Naruto turned to Sakura to see what see wanted.

"I'm going to go home now. You and I both know we have a lot of work in the morning so get some rest will you? Anyway goodnight, Naruto." With that, Sakura went home to catch up on her sleep.

"She's probably right, and besides, if I go to sleep now I might be able to escape those darn fights for the day." Naruto quickly finished his ramen and went home to his comfy bed and his missing window.

"Ah, the perfect ending to a perfect day." Said Naruto as he fell into his bed and rolled over.  
"Goodnight, perfect day." Seconds later, Naruto was fast asleep.

"Hey kid! Get up! Hey!"

Naruto rolled over, no longer on his bed, but on a concrete sidewalk.

Naruto looked to the origin of the voice to see a muscular, tan man wearing a skin tight blue suit and a racing helmet. The only part of his skin you could see was his mouth.

"Who are you? How did I get here?" Said Naruto, still groggy from his awakening.

The man grinned, "I'm Captain Falcon, but I don't know the answer to your other question. Sorry."

Naruto decided to ignore Captain Falcon for a minute to take in his surroundings,  
he was surrounded with skyscrapers everywhere, beside him was a barren road with more potholes and cracks in it than Naruto could described, and the barely visible sky was orange and grey, with a road running all around the place. All around it seemed depressing, almost. Like no one spoke up ever.

Captain Falcon saw that Naruto was not familiar with where he was, "We're in Mute City."

"Thanks." Naruto's answer came barely above a whisper, as he was still in awe of the city.

"You should not stay out here. I'll take you to a hotel and get back to you tomorrow." Said the Captain.

The only thing Naruto said from there to the hotel was, 'Okay.'

Upon reaching the hotel, which had warm lights and beige walls along with a mix of leather and fabric furniture, the pair immediately went into the lobby, and Captain Falcon immediately dragged them past reception to the bar. Captain Falcon turned to Naruto.

"Are you underaged to drink?"

Naruto smiled, "Who cares, I bet I can still win in a drinking contest!"

It was the Captains turn to smile, "You're on!"

2 PINTS LATER:

Naruto was still going strong, with the help of the Kyuubi.

Captain Falcon was doing just fine as well, with the help of his super strong liver.

'HUMAN WASTE!'

Naruto immediately recognized the voice in his head as the Kyuubi.

"What do you want?" Replied Naruto.

'I just thought I should tell you that I didn't help with the rat poison on purpose and that I'm done helping you with your recent increase in alcohol intake, jerk.'

Naruto snorted, "Pfft, I don't need your help with this."

Captain Falcon broke Naruto out of his conversation with the Kyuubi, "Here's the next round, ready?"

2 MORE PINTS LATER:

Naruto felt ready to vomit at any second, but held it in for the sake of the contest.

Captain Falcon spoke up, "Hey Naruto,"

Naruto looked his way, showing he had his attention.

"We should race in a few days from now. Loser has to give the winner a $1000."

Naruto felt sick thinking about moving fast, but considered the challenge. Naruto decided he was ready and willing for a race, he knew he could outrun even a dude like Captain Falcon.

"Alright Captain, want to call it a bet?"

Captain Falcon smiled, "Sure. You better get your race car ready. You only have three days."

At this point Naruto would be concerned about how they would be racing cars and not on foot, but instead he gave into the alcohol and simply passed out.

TOMMORROW, NOON. (THREE DAYS UNTIL RACE):

Naruto Rolled onto his side. His head felt like it was being crushed by a ten ton brick.  
"What the hell happened?" He asked no one in particular.

He looked at his surroundings, the walls were the same as the ones downstairs in the lobby and the morning sun shinning through the dim clouds was similar to the lights from last night. He was laying in a puffy bed that had orange-yellow sheets. Beside him was a dark stained oak night stand.

Naruto got out of bed and cleaned up, going outside to see a man in the hallway he vaguely reconised.

"You ready for the race?" Said Captain Falcon.

All at once, Naruto remembered the conditions of the bet made last night, "Oh, yeah. Sure..."

"See you in three days. By the way, you'll have to meet me at the track above the city."

With that the Captain left.

Naruto could only muster two words that entire afternoon, "Well shit."

THE NEXT MORNING. (TWO DAYS UNTIL RACE):

Naruto at this point mustered the motivation to go into town and look for a place where he could get a car for cheap that could save Naruto $1000.

Naruto was walking to what looked like dealership, when something to his right caught his sight.

"Looks like I'll be keeping my money, This one's in the bag!"

THE NEXT DAY, AFTERNOON. (ONE DAY UNTIL RACE):

Naruto had had some slight modifications made to his car and was ready for the race.

"Might as well scope out the track." Said Naruto as he made his way to the track.

Naruto had meant to ask locals for directions to the track, but he had found no one on the street.

So instead, he was here, jumping from rooftop to rooftop and finally jumping onto a low part of the track, from which he could navigate the entire track. He thought it looked good for going fast, then again, if it didn't, it wouldn't exactly be a very good race track. Naruto's final test was that the floor of the track was solid and smooth, and it passed that test too.

"Perfect. I'll give that Falcon dude a run for his money!"

THE NEXT DAY, EARLY MORNING. (DAY OF THE RACE):

Captain was at the start of the track next to his car, the Blue Falcon, waiting for Naruto to show up.

"Hey you! I hope you're ready!" Called Naruto as he hopped from building to building, as he had done yesterday.

Captain Falcon snorted, "Is THAT what you'll be racing in?"

Naruto smiled, "What's so funny about it?"

"Just look at it! The thing must be from the twentieth century for goodnesses sake! It's rusted beyond believe! It doesn't even have a floor inside it! Also, your car number is 69 and you put it on with spray paint. I almost feel bad for racing you now." Said Captain Falcon

Naruto still had the silly grin on his face. "Don't worry 'bout it, Just get ready to race already!"

The Captain didn't look so sure, "Whatever you say, man."

Naruto, now sitting in his rust bucket – which he had aptly named the Humble Excuse – looked up at the stop light looking thing that was meant to signal when to start racing.

It flashed from red to yellow to green for go very quickly, leaving Naruto off guard, which gave Captain Falcon a perfect chance to speed off at 284 miles an hour (457 KmH) and ahead of Naruto.

Naruto made a face that was a mix of anger and just-sucked-a-lemon,

"That's sour. Better hurry."

Naruto put his feet trough the hole in the bottom of his car, used his hands to pick it up at the side and started running very fast.

It did not take Naruto long to catch up to the Blue Falcon, however when he reached the speeding car, Captain Falcon rammed his car into Naruto's 'car'.

"Jeez, man, watch out!" Yelled Naruto.

Then the Blue Falcon came rearing back at Naruto, this time Naruto realized they were allowed to push each other.

"Well that makes my job harder..." Grumbled Naruto.

Naruto sped off again, quickly completing the first lap. However, about halfway through the second lap, he saw seven other cars on the track.

"Who are these people?"

Seven heads turned to seven tinted windows all to see the same rusty car, then seven voices rang in unison, "Who is that kid?"

Naruto would not have cared much about the other racers, except that they were parked in between him and $1000.

Naruto got out of his car and walked to the other cars and started knocking on one of the windshields,

"Hey, you guys mind getting out of my way?"

"Hey, guys, he's attacking the cars, lets beat the shit out of him!"

Naruto heard this being said loud and clear so as the other racers got out of their cars, Naruto busted his own into pieces.

As the racers approached, Naruto quickly launched long, slender strips of rusted metal at them, which effectively stopped their attack, and their lives.

"Phew, that's over."

From behind Naruto an engine was roaring but was cut off and was replaced by the squeal of hard braking. The vehicle stopped quickly and the hatch was popped, and out came a familiar figure.

"What the hell happened here, Naruto?!" Yelled Captain Falcon.

"Well they were just about to kill me, and I'm just in my dumb dream anyways so..."

"You killed them?!"

"Yeah." Replied Naruto.

"Well, I'm going to have to end you for tha–" Captain Falcon was cut off by a shard of rusty metal cutting off his frontal lobe from the rest of his brain, trough the side of his temple.

Without saying another word Captain Falcon left for a hospital.

"Well, that's done" Said Naruto.

"How shall I escape this place..."

Naruto looked to the edge of the track and smiled.

"Cannon-ball!" Shouted Naruto as he leaped off the track.

Shortly after his jump, Naruto was in bed, back in Kanoha.

Naruto look at his sundial.

"Oh, shit! I'm late as the opposite of a crap with coffee and a bran muffin!"

Naruto ran out the door to attend to his ninja business.

**AN: Sorry for this chapter being twice as long for no reason at all.**


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Phoenix Wright. (Or Taco Bell.)

Chapter Seven: That Doesn't Seem Wright...

Naruto was sick of arguing. He had argued at the ramen stand when they changed the price, he had argued with a criminal that was toying with a deadly weapon, and he had argued with the sun when it woke him up. Honestly, if someone tried to argue with Naruto at that point, he'd probably just stab them in the leg.

"Hey asshole!"

Naruto turned to the man who had insulted him. The man was short, rather round and was balding on top of his head. The man wore a pinstriped suit that was grey and black.

"What do you want, baldy?" Inquired Naruto.

The man looked as if he were perpetually flinching, "You got dirt on my pant leg!"

"So?"

"So!? This suit costs about what you make in a few years!" Scoffed the man.

"I don't care Mr. … wait what's your name?"

The mans face cringed, "I'm going to ignore the fact that you don't know it. My name is Fred."

Naruto had heard of this man, he was loaded with cash.

Fred spoke up again, "I'll be seeing you in court!"

Fred left, but Naruto knew that a lawyer would cost him to much...

IN THE LIBRARY:

Naruto had made about 300 shadow clones and handed each of them a book of law.

"Alright, all of you read the book you're holding cover to cover and then go back and review all of its critical information. You all know the caliber of lawyer Fred's going to have."

Naruto heard 300 sighs in unison and then the sound of pages turning.

IN A LARGE, EXPENSIVE MANSION:

Fred paced, he knew that he could not back down from suing the kid in the orange suit, but he also knew that his claim against him was that he made his pants dirty.

"Well, for now I guess I should call my lawyer..."

Fred made the short walk to his gold plated phone and picked it up. He dialed with light speed the number to call his lawyer.

The person on the other end picked up on the first ring, "Hello, who is this?"

"It's me Fred. Whom am I speaking to?"

"This is Phoenix Wright, what do you need Fred?"

Fred smiled, "I have a case for you."

"I'll be in Kanoha before noon tomorrow."

With that, Wright hung up. Enough had been said. Fred smiled,

"I'll have that boy by his neck."

Then, an idea stuck Fred. "Oh, that's brilliant..." He said laughing and walking out of the room.

BACK IN THE LIBRARY:

Naruto smiled as the memories from his clones came rushing back to him.

"This will be a piece of cake."

By now Naruto had all his clones back and decided to get some rest so his brain could process all the information just thrown its way.

OUTSIDE FRED'S MANSION:

"I'm glad you made it here on such short notice, Mr. Wright."

"I'm glad to be here. Anyway, please, let's talk about the case."

Fred shifted a bit in his seat, "Well, a boy got dirt on my leg."

"Go on" Said Phoenix Wright.

Fred shifted again, "That's all there is to it. But I have a plan to make more of it."

This time, it was Wright who shifted in his seat,

"Your plan wouldn't alter the truth at all, would it?"

Fred looked to his sides nervously, "It would, just a bit, but for the amount I'm paying you, I'd say you don't have a choice but to play along with it. I need this publicity, Phoenix."

Phoenix looked around, "You know I'm not used to working for the Plaintiff."

Fred's face twisted into a grin, "don't worry about, you'll feel right at home working my case."

KANOHA, NEAR THE COURT:

Naruto was walking to the local court, excited to use his new lawyer skills, and to see who is the best lawyer money can buy.

"There's the door, you can do this, Naruto." Naruto said to himself.

Now inside the court, Naruto walked in the room he was told was where he would defend his innocence. He walked in to see his opponent already siting behind a engraved name plate that said 'PLAINTIFF'. Naruto walk over to sit behind one that read 'DEFENDANT'.

Naruto heard a voice telling all to rise. He then took an oath and sat back down.

The judge spoke, "Lets make this fast, I had coffee and taco bell for breakfast. Would the plaintiff please tell us what happened."

Fred shuffled trough some papers he had, "Your honor? May I ask that my lawyer speak for me?"

The judge rolled their eyes, obviously just wanting to get on with things, "Fine."

Phoenix Wright stepped up to the stand, "Well, your honor, my client was walking through the town square, enjoying the weather, when this boy came up to him, kicking dirt all around, and then trying to murder poor Fred here. Surely you can see the hate in the boys eyes."

Naruto's head whipped around to look at Phoenix, "I did what now?!"

The judge scolded Naruto, "Speak when spoken to! Is it true that you tried to murder Fred?"

Naruto was angry now, "No! Absolutely not! He's full of shit!"

"Watch your tongue!" Snapped the judge.

"Your honor?" The judge look back to Phoenix Wright, "I would say this is the type of violence the boy took out on Fred here."

The judge was leaning towards Wrights story, "Make your defense, boy"

Naruto looked from Wright, whom was on Naruto's right, to the judge, "While I did get some dirt on Mr. Fred over there, I did nothing to harm him."

Phoenix spoke up again, "Do you have evidence of your innocence?"

Naruto smiled, "No, but do you have evidence against me?"

Phoenix Wright chuckled, "Actually, yes."

The color drained from Naruto's face as Wright brought in a witness.

The judge addressed Wright's witness, "How do you recall the events we are discussing?"

"Uh... Mr. Wrights telling the truth." Naruto noticed the witness fondling something in his pocket.

Naruto looked to the judge, "Your honor? May I ask what the witness is fondling in his left pocket?"

The judge heard Naruto and had asked the witness to explain the giant nugget of gold he removed from his pocket.

"Uh... well, you see-"

Naruto cut him off, "Your honor, I believe Fred is bribing this man to lie, I don't even recall this man being in the square when I was there."

The judge turned to Fred and Phoenix Wright for an explanation.

Wright spoke first, as he was first to succumb to pressure, "It's true, your honor, I am too being bribed.

This whole case was a big publicity stunt."

The judge slammed the gavel into the anvil and said, "Case closed"

Within ten minutes Naruto was on his way home.

He saw the ramen stand and decided to celebrate, even if the price was jacked up.

However, to Naruto's surprise, the price was back to normal.

After ramen Naruto walked home.

On his way to his building, he walked past the prison, and peeking in, he saw the criminal from before being scolded by a guard.

Upon reaching his bed and getting ready for sleep, Naruto looked out his window to see his timing was perfect, he laid down in bed right as the sun finished setting over the horizon.

Naruto quickly fell into a well earned deep sleep that spelled an end to the events of the past few days.


End file.
